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This Summer

by Kicksie

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1.
i can see you from across the street over there you’re staring back at me do you dream of getting close to me? you cross the road nearly once a week i can feel you slowly slipping sometimes i wish you never had to leave me behind i get so lonely when you’re not beside me i’m rolling in my sleep i’m rolling in my sleep please stay in love with me please stay in love with me we could live happily please stay in love i like your hair in the summer time i like when you tell me that you’re mine we watch movies when we’re in your bed we get handsy whenever we can you remind me of a better time you’ve given me all my better nights i go crazy when you smile at me stuck in routine but you set me free i’m rolling in my sleep please stay in love with me please stay in love with me we could live happily please stay in love i’m rolling in my sleep please stay in love with me please stay in love with me we could live happily please stay in love
2.
Sounds Cool 04:08
my name is crazy i live in a hellhole dug six feet into the ground he’s so impatient mr. lying to sound cool and making me feel put out you never take it from the top you only starve me ’til i rot you think about the things i want you’re laughing at me from above you keep forcing a faster pace you’re waiting for the day i break you cross your arms and watch me pray i’m sick and tired of your face he’s quick to anger so i dodge his emotions i’m too scared to wear him down i’ve cut the ropes that had me bound and set it all on fire i hope it’s in flames all year-round you never take it from the top you only starve me ’til i rot you think about the things i want you’re laughing at me from above you keep forcing a faster pace you’re waiting for the day i break you cross your arms and watch me pray i’m sick and tired of your face you never take it from the top you only starve me ’til i rot you think about the things i want you’re laughing at me from above you keep forcing a faster pace you’re waiting for the day i break you cross your arms and watch me pray i’m sick and tired of your face
3.
This Summer 03:01
don’t get me wrong, don’t ask why we should run this summer by aren’t you sick of your life and all our wasted time you said you had a problem with the truth i said “the hell with it, i don’t need you” all that you wanted was a little bit so i gave you nothing sometimes i think, what if i did, what if i did? sometimes i wonder if i should go back and redo it it hurts my brain, so i jus t give up and let it be i’ll work on it slowly don’t get me wrong, don’t ask why we should run this summer by aren’t you sick of your life and all our wasted time am i a bad person for hating it whenever i can’t seem to match up with the kind of person that i thought you were well how could it not hurt i can’t admit, you’re in my head, you’re in my head i can’t ever say that you weren’t in my bed i feel like crap, with what goes on behind the scenes i’ll heal up slowly don’t get me wrong, don’t ask why we should run this summer by aren’t you sick of your life and all our wasted time
4.
Benjamin 02:50
he stole my phone for the weekend just to prove himself to my friend that he exists, don’t you worry i’ll give you all of the glory i texted her when i got back she had never been so upset that they had talked, she had felt i abandoned her for the weekend if we were way back in ’15 i’d have so many friends but i had to wake up finally and stop playing pretend it took me long enough to put my shoes on and go outside so i could go to the skatepark and waste all of my time i’m super glad that we don’t talk so hopefully you’ll forget the things i had said when we first met i needed all the attention what was the point of the things we did just to destroy our feelings since i had nothing better to do with our time but to hate you if we were way back in ’15 i’d have so many friends but i had to wake up finally and stop playing pretend it took me long enough to put my shoes on and go outside so i could go to the skatepark and waste all of my time
5.
pretty boy from outta town, outta town all i do is stick around, to announce the second u come back home ur a fire & i’m freezing cold pretty boy from outta town, show urself it’s starting to weigh me down, stick it out i don’t feel a thing no more ur a seesaw with no back & forth
6.
roller coaster anticipation with a hint of summer the perfect recipe for any lover looking to have themselves thinking forever depends on the weather roller coaster it started and then it ended even faster it didn’t take either long to discover that both of their voices could get much louder than they had thought rubbing your hands over your eyes starts a fire you used to run down the street at night, but now you hardly go outside roller coaster she hates the way he has to hover over her like a plane, as if he’s under cover she goes insane, he says he doesn’t love her enough to stay roller coaster she’s got a baby bump, she calls him over but he does not show up, they both get colder he thinks he’s warm enough but never sober to realize he’s stuck rubbing your hands over your eyes starts a fire you used to run down the street at night, but now you hardly go outside
7.
Checkmate 02:53
I USED TO HIDE HIM UNDERGROUND BUT HE’S COMING AROUND I USED TO NEVER LET HIM OUT BUT HE’S SCREAMING HELP WHERE AM I GOING? WHERE WILL I BE A YEAR FROM NOW? LOST IN ETERNITY I’M NOT WHO I SHOULD BE I’M NOT WHO I SHOULD BE I DIDN’T THINK THAT THIS WAS HELL I NEVER HAD A DOUBT HE SPEAKS WHEN I DON’T MAKE A SOUND CHECKMATE THE KING FELL DOWN WHERE AM I GOING? WHERE WILL I BE A YEAR FROM NOW? LOST IN ETERNITY I’M NOT WHO I SHOULD BE I’M NOT WHO I SHOULD BE
8.
back then it was easy. i still had time for deciding what i wanted, who i was and where i’m going with my life. woah, woah, woah, woah. it starts off feeling really good and then steadily gets worse, i hope that one day i can tell what’s a blessing from a curse. i keep saying one day it’ll be cool to hang out with me. it starts off feeling really good and then steadily gets worse, i hope that one day i can tell what’s a blessing from a curse. yes man, no way i can’t escape my pride and it's pretty confusing it starts off feeling really good and then steadily gets worse, i hope that one day i can tell what’s a blessing from a curse.
9.
suicide, this bathtub my best friend had filled it cyanide, that moment now i can’t even hold him suicide, it happens in front of your eyes it happens your whole world could change in a second so love all your friends, they’re a blessing i swear to god i’ll save you from it i swear to god i’ll save you from it now i can’t even hold him now i don’t even know him i get numb with the news always above like a cloud over my head people know to stay out of my way at this point i don’t give them a warning suicide, it’s not fair to decide your future on your own, your friends can’t tell you you’re being stupid if you go to bed in the evening i promise you will wake up in the morning now i can’t even hold him now i don’t even know him you don’t deserve to die like this is it too much to ask you to live if you go to bed in the evening i promise you will wake up in the morning i promise
10.
we’re in another dimension we’re floating in space did i mention you spin me around, sit me back down i think you’re something else i will dissolve in the ocean like the waves we’re doing the motions pulling back and forth, my lover of sorts is happy with me on the shore you feel heavy on my heart you’re stuck beating in my chest lately i’ve been such a mess i’m in love i must confess baby you’re a blessing to me i cannot believe you stay with me even though i can be such a tyranny whenever i dream you’re beside me even while i sleep you remind me that you’ll help me out, i have no doubt if it’s wrong you turn it around i’ve never felt such a safety as i have since we started dating my whole heart and soul is so comfortable and i am entirely grateful you feel heavy on my heart you’re stuck beating in my chest lately i’ve been such a mess i’m in love i must confess baby you’re a blessing to me i cannot believe you stay with me even though i can be such a tyranny baby you’re a blessing to me baby you’re a blessing to me baby you are everything i need baby you mean everything to me you feel heavy on my heart you’re stuck beating in my chest lately i’ve been such a mess i’m in love i must confess baby you’re a blessing to me i cannot believe you stay with me even though i can be such a tyranny

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released June 8, 2018

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Kicksie Toronto, Ontario

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